Casting our Cares Upon Him

I am praying today for the courage Christ is giving me to truly examine ME, my life, and not let sin hide from His gaze (not that it ever could). But in my reasoning, I somehow seem to think that it could. I have always believed that God sovereignly orders my life, but I find myself, humbly acknowledging this, that God sovereignly orders my life and circumstances, for one good & for one purpose, to humble me so that I can truly find Jesus. The great life that He came to give seems to be only found through this process. Until I see this, and get rid of what is 'clouding' out this reality, I can't understand my own deep need for HIm.

I have been reading Romans and struggling to really 'grab' ahold of it. Paul was, in the first few chapters, trying to get them to realize that they were nothing, even tho they were Jews and well schooled in the scriptures. He knew that they needed to be 'stripped entirely' of their self righteousness and self worth in that regard, and to instead face their own desperate need of Him. (It's quite easy to think that somehow the Jews needed alot more stripping away than we ever would, hmmm) They could only be prepared to do that by understanding that the law had not worked anything into their heart that didn't now need to be stripped away, that their heart was just as depraved as others. They still believed alot of good about themselves, and they didn't understand their own need for Jesus. They couldn't come to Christ without first understanding their own depravity and desperate condition. Paul knew that because they 'had the law', they thought they were better and would have a hard time facing up to the fact that they couldn't totally see their absolute need for total dependance on Christ. Paul understood that this represented a huge big problem for them, BUT I contend that as much as it was a huge problem for them, it is just as huge for us too.

We are all deceived in our own darkened understanding, of who we truly 'think' we are. So an accurate assessment of who we are (proved by circumstances to humble) is that apart from Him, I am truly NOTHING. What Christ has for me is a great inheritance, but I cannot find this if I think I still have 'a good heart' it can only be found by being broken & humbled. This seems to be what we resist most. We still think we are somehow 'good'. So I am carefully considering why Paul was saying what He was saying to them because in fact, it is being said to me.

I encourage you also to face those things in your life whatever they may be (with joy) and allow Christ to test you and test your attitudes. Only Christ knows what it is that we are gravitating towards that makes us think 'we somehow have an edge' that 'we somehow have a superior understanding or revelation' that many don't have. This is all foolishness & worthless, just as it was for the Jews. Allow Him to test your 'darkened understanding' so that you too can sincerely humble yourself before 'his exposing light' and move forward in His grace & forgiveness ...